Why You Should Still Date Your Spouse

Notes from Topical Study: Why You Should Still Date Your Spouse
​Facilitators: Cameron and Kristal Boone
Teleconference held June 28, 2016
 
Introduction:  Why we chose this topic…Something that is important but gets overlooked.  As you get busy it can easily get neglected.  We had different couples tell us the importance of maintaining our relationship.  They were sharing from the experience of not doing that and now realize they should have never stopped.  We have also personally seen the benefits of maintaining this part of our relationship.
 
Cameron and Kristal’s Top Ten Reasons:

1. Priorities:  Dating is a part of making your marriage a priority.  Making time for one another should always be a priority. 
2. Romance:  Keeps fire and interest for one another.  It’s an opportunity to woo and draw one another.  Doing those things that got your spouse’s attention in the first place and keep them interested and engaged.  It is important that we see that side of one another (to know that your spouse is still interested).
3. Friendship:  The bond of friendship is developed and maintained through spending meaningful time together.  You never want to stop being friends.  When you are friends it is easier to share and be vulnerable with one another. This is all part of developing intimacy and trust.  You should have no closer friend than your spouse.
4. Anticipation:  Gives you both something to look forward to.  A break from the busyness of life.  Keeps things interesting.  In return, creates excitement.  Sparks desirous feelings. 
5. Fun:  It’s just fun!  And you should make time for fun alone with each other.  It is part of keeping your relationship fresh and young at heart.
6. Adult time:  If you have kids, particularly little ones, you need time away to be yourselves, an adult, not just mommy and daddy.  You need to be reminded that you are husband and wife, handsome and hot.
7. Investment: You reap what you sow.  Dating is time sowing into your marriage and into one another.  You will see a good return in every part of your life.  Your marriage is good ground to sow into.  We believe that God will honor your dedication to your spouse and will multiply what is sown.  We have seen us mature, blessed financially, peace, joy, happiness, overall quality of life increase.  The same blessings extend to our children.
8. Memories:  It is important to build good memories together.  It is part of creating history and building a story together.  You’ll be able to draw from those good memories for years to come.  It is something to hold fast to when you may be having challenges in your marriage.
9. Good Example:  It is a good example for children and others.  The world needs Godly couples loving one another.
10. Love: It is an expression of love that pleases the Father.  It is another opportunity to allow God’s love to work through you for your spouse’s benefit.  It is an opportunity to nurture your spouse through time, effort, attention, loving words and meaningful demonstrations of love.

 
When you date your spouse, the results are:

• A stronger bond – oneness
• Intimacy
• Being in sync
• Growing Together
• Attraction, excitement, continued desire for one another
• Even if struggling in marriage, dating is still beneficial, still working good in the marriage

 
Scriptures:  Eph 5:31, Matthew 19:4-8
All of this is part of the fulfillment of God’s plan for husband and wife to come together as one flesh, for their lifetime.  However, it doesn’t happen on it’s own and it doesn’t happen without God.
 
Definition of “Date”: An appointment with one another.  Can be lunch or dinner after the kids are in bed.  Can be expensive or cost nothing at all.  Can be 1 hour or 3 days.  Whatever it is, make it special and intentional.  Plan ahead of time.  Schedule it weekly or bi weekly.  Once a month is not enough.  Too much can happen in a month.
 
AND PLEASE DRESS TO IMPRESS!  Dress for the occasion but try and look good for your spouse.  You didn’t look raggedy when you were dating so don’t do it now.